My daily bread

Yesterday I did not win mother of year. In fact it was one of the hardest parenting days I think I have had yet. I had several moments of wondering what am I doing, how do I handle this situation? I was severely doubting my parenting abilities.

 The previous day the little miss and I had enjoyed a long afternoon at the pool which led to only a short nap in the car on the way home. Later that night she somehow got a burst of energy that kept her up till 11 30. The next morning she woke up at 8 15. Now to some this might be nothing but Brielle is a sleeper. She sleeps a consistent 12 hours each night and loves her nap. So from the second she woke up there were tears. Not just whining but lots and lots of hard crying.

 Thinking about it now it seems so trivial but yesterday I felt extremely inadequate. She is 2. She can't be rationalized with. I get that. Plus it was my fault she didn't get a nap and that she didn't go to bed earlier, so why could I not be patient? Why was I allowing myself to get so frustrated and overwhelmed with the situation? After SEVERAL unsuccessful attempts to get her to nap and some negative attempts on my part to control her behavior, she was still crying and my weaknesses seemed to be magnified. I felt so frustrated because all I want in the world for this little girl is for her to have what is best and for her to be happy. I want my children to always know of my love for them even in moments of discipline. I then realized that I had been so focused on the discipline and frustrated by the days events that I was forgetting the love that I so deeply want her to feel.

 I realized I already knew what to do but had failed to do it. I needed to get on my knees and ask my Heavenly Father for help. I was reminded of "my daily bread". I realized how important it is to ask quite literally for what we need to get through the day, or even the moment. In that moment, I needed a lot more patience. After that I was able to handle the situation in a way that I did not regret and she finally slept. When she woke up she was happy and we enjoyed our evening as a family.

 Parenting is hard. Period.

More importantly, it is one of the greatest blessings in my life. 

 I want with every ounce of my soul to do it well. 

 Not so I can win mother of the year but so those sweet children I tuck into bed at night can have good lives. 

 Yesterday was a learning experience for all of us and today I will again ask for my daily bread and I know He will provide. I know I will have the patience to do what I need to do. And because of that parenting may still be hard but it will make me happy. Which I hope will make us all happy.